Toilet Missed

A few weeks ago, I proclaimed that Darren was officially toilet trained.
Well he kinda was, and I already stopped putting his diapers on during the day for nearly two months now.
But please know that he does miss once in a while.

I don’t want to intimidate any other mommies out there by unfairly telling only the “ups” and not the “downs”. So, here’s one of the “downs”.

Darren peed in his pants last week.
He did said “PEE”, but it was only about three seconds before his “water broke”, when I was frantically trying to haul him to the toilet.
Where did this happen? No, unfortunately, not at home. In Sunday School! Ouch!
Although it was a little bit embarassing, considering how much I had bragged about him being off diapers, I managed to hold on to the primary rule of toilet training: NEVER discourage him by stressing on his errors or showing him too much, if any, disappointment. (I made that rule.)

So, I looked at him and smiled, saying that it was OK and that he should tell me BEFORE his next urge to pee. The fact that he took the whole thing easily and was already off to play within a few seconds was as a good sign of his mental state regarding his toilet training.

Among his other excellence, to tell you the truth, being toilet trained so early is one of Darren’s most surprising and fulfilling development.
To mommies out there who might be curious, here’s some toilet training tips (I’m also writing this to keep a note for myself, in case I’m having more kids –nope, SO not in the near future-) :

1. Keep in mind that you’re not TRAINING him, you’re SHOWING him the right place to pee/poop.

2. During the day, since early on, let him pee in his pants so he learns to feel the sensation of peeing and being wet (in Indonesia, mommies generally don’t use disposable diapers as much as mommies in the West. Personally, I think this helps. Although I must remind you, it’s oh SO MESSY!!)

3. At some 5 or 6 months, bring him to pee in the bathroom (I held Darren in my arms and “aimed” his pee into the toilet bowl), regardless he pees or not. Make it regular (some once or twice a day and gradually more frequent as he grows older), but keep in mind, DON’T EVER BE PUSHY (don’t expect him to pee every time you try, and don’t be disappointed if he doesn’t).

4. Make the point number 3 as fun as you can.

5. If he does pee into the toilet, PRAISE him with all your might. Make him understand (gradually, as he grows older) exactly why you praise him.

6. Once he’s able to sit up, sit him on a potty on the toilet bowl to pee or poop (remember, NEVER LEAVE HIM ALONE in the bathroom!).

7. Don’t compare him to other kids or set targets. Kids are different. Accept and love your kid as he is, that’s the best encouragement.

8. And, as I said before, NEVER discourage him by stressing on his errors or showing him too much, if any, disappointment. Together, celebrate his success, and underrate his un-success (make sure you encourage him if ever you feel a pinch of disappointment on his side). He’ll eventually think of peeing or pooping into the toilet as his personal achievement.

That’s all, I guess. By the time Darren learned to speak, he immediately told us when he needed to go. If I remembered correctly, it was when he reached 13 months of age.
At that time, he didn’t always mean it when he said “PEE” or “POOP”. Sometimes he just made fun of it, sometimes he just wanted to watch our urgency.

I guess one of the key to success was not expecting too much and just let things flow. When he’s ready, he’s ready.

Good luck, mommies ^______^